27 mai 2022

Asleep

 I was asleep.


I was drifting and dreaming, sometimes remembering a bit. And by remembering that bit, it changed me to the point of chasing to expand on what I remembered. Like an up-and-coming addict going through the early stages.


What early stages? Of the person becoming addicted by starting to crave for more of that feeling in his body and in his mind, after taking the first hits of his drug of choice. Stop interrupting me.


When I would dream something really interesting and I'd remember it and keep refreshing myself with that memory, it would always feel like there could be more to it than what I managed to remember. Even more of what I actually dreamt, more of that world and situation.


I came back to that explanation about the early stages and expanded on it a little bit. Now it's perfectly clear, so stop bothering me about it.


So I'd start with setting things up, to map that dream into something like a story or a script. And obviously there would be a main character, me. In different shapes and forms, but in any case... it was still me. Then you needed to look around your self in the dream. Like a baby looking at his own palms and suddenly realizing they're his. Time would go by, the baby would learn more about the self and about the environment surrounding the self. 


But I did not know this. The thing about how a baby discovers the world. And this is where my dreams and the process for chasing them got annihilated. It is because I was asleep.


Until I learned what I needed, the way that time went by was making it impossible to write more. To remember more. And to expand more.


Stop interrupting me, please.


The time for sleep and chasing dreams comes and goes. It isn't something you can set in stone, either.


People act like being asleep is such a bad thing. And chasing dreams is an exaggeration in their eyes. When it rarely end with success, it's celebrated. Most of the time it ends with failure and so naturally it is shun.


It's almost as if being successful means you are right, no matter what you did or currently are doing. 


So I have a few dreams that I recalled vividly a lot of times and I'm going to try and turn them into full stories, to expand on their premises and include a lot more than what I managed to recall.


Yes, I know about the possibility of a shared universe. It might just be something like that, but the dreams are all pretty unique and weird or worse.


#proactiveness